Damn Davis! I Didn’t Know Your Restaurant Delivered!

 

The one ship in Girlfriends that didn’t get a chance to sail—(Joavis or Hamton) for Joan Clayton and Davis Hamilton. 

Picture this: a Girlfriends reunion film includes Joan Clayton and her three besties Maya Wilkes, Lynn Searcy, and Toni Childs alongside Toni’s twenty-year-old daughter Morgan Garrett and Maya’s son Jabari Wilkes indulging in the ultimate bachelorette weekend in Ghana. The lush, colorful scenery gives the audience an inviting glimpse into African glory, the hypnotic beats set the mood, and the golden ladies dance with each other, dewy skin glowing, fully in the cusp of embracing their fifties. Out of nowhere, the music stops and Davis enters, his eyes finding Joan’s immediately….

Sadly, it won’t happen, as any potential has been shut down— not to say that my idea was their intention anyway. Might be better in the fanfiction realm. 

Davis (Randy Goodwin) and Joan (Tracee Ellis Ross) shared conversation proves that their attraction remains mutual despite their opposing relationship goals. 

Davis doesn’t want to let go of Joan’s hand and who could blame him? 

Davis Hamilton, the handsome owner of the 847 restaurant was the best possible fit for Joan, lawyer turned eventual business owner. Who could ever forget their fire chemistry in season one’s second episode, One Night Stand? Joan almost risked her three-month rule, telling an elaborate exaggeration to her friends about an innocent moment between her and the engaged Davis. It’s where we get Toni’s infamous line, “damn Davis! I didn’t know your restaurant delivered!” 

By the end, a newly single Davis offers Joan the very thing she was obsessing over. 

“Yes! Oh God yes! The couch, the tables, wherever you want!” Joan’s mind screams. 

Bravely, Joan sticks to using her shower head for experimental purposes. Her declination of Davis also promised growth, that the next partner would be worth the drought. Whereas Davis represented playing the field— the kind of man putting no effort into a commitment so soon after a called off engagement. He was nursing no broken heart and desired an instantaneous “no strings attached” situation, a lackluster, anti-Joan incentive. 

Look at Joan’s (Tracee Ellis Ross) smitten face as Maya (Golden Brooks), Toni (Jill Marie Jones), and Lynn (Persia White) watch in season one, episode fourteen’s Bad Timing! 

Joan and Davis continue their light flirtations along the course of random episodes, a subtle cross between a friendly association and sweet customer / owner camaraderie. Joan enters relationships with Marcus, the hips who buys the special Joan-tone phone, Frank, the married guy, and Sean, the recovering sex addict— the latter notices a problem between Joan and Davis.

When Sean’s away to Toronto around Valentine’s Day, Davis brings lunch over to Joan’s office and steals a passionate kiss. 

Later, Davis (Randy Goodwin) comes to Joan’s (Tracee Ellis Ross) house and requests her company for the weekend— to explore what it is between them. Sean (Dondre T. Whitfield) returns early and doesn’t like what he sees. 

Joan is tempted by Davis’s enticing Palm Springs weekend, showcasing that the man still hasn’t learned from One Night Stand. If Joan and Davis were both available, their relationship foundation would have been stronger and mutually beneficial— the only scandal existing being their electric charisma. Unfortunately, Joan ultimately chooses Sean over Davis, settling. In the long run, perhaps Joan believes that Davis isn’t serious, that he would break her heart. She didn’t want to take that chance. Instead, she lets her boyfriend issue an ultimatum— stop going to Davis’s restaurant. 

Joan and Sean and Davis and Ava stay cordial, but the little longing looks Joan and Davis give each other over their loved one’s shoulders spoke volumes.  

Davis straight macks a blushing Joan as Sean uncomfortably looks on in season one, episode nineteen’s A Kiss Before Lying— a play on Ernest Gaines novel A Lesson Before Dying. 

Joan hosts an intimate dinner at her home with Sean, Davis, and Ava. It does not go well. 

Joan and Davis’s last encounter occurred in season four, episode thirteen’s The Comedy of Eros— and it involves an humbling intimacy differing from their previous interactions. In fact, the short and special interlude makes us still pine for what ifs between them. 

After a recent breakup, Joan spends February Fourteenth celebrating that other holiday— the disregarded Single Awareness Day. This down-to-earth side of Joan temporarily quiets her typical obsession about men, getting hitched, and having babies for a minute, to love on herself. However, it was quite adorable that Toni bought Joan a tennis bracelet. She knew where to find her best friend, having noticed that Joan’s “movie sweater” was missing. 

Toni believes that going to the cinema alone is pathetic and kindly wants to be there for Joan…

Except Joan doesn’t want her company. 

Joan evades her well-meaning bestie, moving to another part of the theater and bashes popcorn in front of none other than Davis Hamilton. They bask in the delight of each other’s presence, hugging and smiling, looking like radiant old friends. The chemistry remains undeniably palpable despite Joan’s determined independence. It’s hard to believe that their past merely included Davis giving Joan discounted meals at 847, stealing a sullen kiss, and asking her to go away with him. 

Joan enjoys her film and popcorn as a familiar face recognizes her.

Naturally, Joan and Davis sit together.

Joan and Davis later have dinner and wine at a restaurant, appearing every bit a couple surrounded by other couple. Davis has once again broken off his engagement to Ava and no longer runs 847. He reminisces on their three-year-old near rendezvous, also occurring near Valentine’s Day. Joan admits that she too is single. He asks the big question— “how come we never got together?” 

Bad timing. Always bad timing. 

True to life. 

Often, circumstances do not align at the moments we want them to. In the beginning, Joan and Davis both needed to mature in certain areas of their respective lives. The mutual attraction was always evident. They just were never ready to go there, to get real serious and vulnerable. Joan sabotaged almost all her relationships with her strict rules and bare minimum compromise. Davis, the cavalier flirt, kept bouncing back to Ava, obviously connected to her in a major way. Thus, there’s no telling if he eventually reunited with her. Or maybe the change in his character was genuine and honest, letting go of the unhealthy weights that no longer held value to him. 

Still, Joan friendzones Davis and views another film, taking pride in her choice to be alone. 

Joan and Davis toast to becoming friends (offscreen because we never see or hear him mentioned again). 

Overall, an indie-spirited Girlfriends film not happening seems so cruel, especially after eighteen years without receiving solid answers. Fans deserve a proper ending to eight seasons. We can invent stories in our heads about Joan, Lynn, Toni, and Maya having backyard barbecues, continuing old traditions such as Joan’s wild Halloween parties. Toni and Joan would reset their relationship as Issa and Molly had done in Insecure. The four ladies would chat about shopping, staying fabulously beautiful, and keeping their relationships exciting among menopause, adult children, dying parents, and health scares. The multiple story arcs potential is strong. 

The ladies were together again in a 2019 episode of black•ish. 

So while Joan Clayton and Davis Hamilton are the key couple in my romanticized imagination, Joan alongside Maya, Lynn, and Toni stays the central heart of the vision— the true love story that Mara Akil Brock wanted audiences to root for. 

Another ‘Abbott Elementary’ Couple Bites The Dust In An Unexpected Way

 

Jacob and Zach during happier times in season one’s Zoo Balloon.

Abbott Elementary’s Zach and Jacob delivered another heartbreak on our beloved comedy. The season three premiere previously showed Melissa dumping her boyfriend Gary, the vending machine guy while Gregory put an abrupt period on whatever could have been between him and Janine. Plus, Janine has temporarily left her treasured second grade classroom for a fellowship office at the school district. Since January, it seemed the audience emerged straight into a Philadelphia cold front.

Everyone shifted. Nothing was the same.

Offhandedly, Janine did reveal that she spent her summer with Jacob and Erika. So, where did that leave Zach if not hanging out with his boyfriend and his crust eating queen?

In Break Up, the fifth episode written by Brittani Nichols (Student Transfer, Ava Vs. Superintendent, Fundraiser, Principal’s Office, and Franklin Institute), Zach and Jacob hit a major snag. Instead of expressing his thoughts out loud ala that memorable “outgrowing a person” advice that he gave to Janine in season one’s Work Family, Jacob sets up passive aggressive tactics that would make anyone go insane. So yes, Zach was righteously angry. An intentional Jacob pushed Zach’s buttons— and those overdramatic gasps.... just amazingly conveyed. 

A teary Zach (Larry Owens) agrees that a breakup may be the right thing to do for him and Jacob (Chris Perfetti) in Break Up. DP: Michael J. Pepin.

When Zach realizes that Jacob has been manipulating the situation, a furious Zach snatches off any edges Jacob may have had. In that passionate, insult-filled spiel, Jacob probably realized he shouldn’t have bragged about his successful schemes. Zach releases “the kraken” and spills so much tea that you wonder how Jacob withstood the heat— and this is before teaching his class too. Damn.  

“And you held our team BACK at trivia night!” Zach snarls, emphasizing back with intentional zing.

If you remember in Desking, season one’s eleventh episode, Zach discloses that they came in third place, Jacob adding that it was due to a technicality. 

Zach looks back at Jacob one last time and departs on a singsong “oh my god.” Laughter comes gushing out uncontrollably. That was, hands down, the most funniest breakup ever witnessed. Not a dry eye in the house. While Melissa and Gary were sad yet amicable and Gregory and Janine crushed shipper spirits, Zach made history by going another route altogether. He was in pain, but wanted to make Jacob feel it too, and you had to respect it. 

Still, queer breakups are as tragic as the BYG trope, especially considering that there is so little evidence on network television at present. Streaming services showcase LGBTQIA+ relationships more— and in braver ways. Zach and Jacob appeared more buddy roommates than lovers. Several episodes showcased their major differences— Jacob being anti-holidays and carols while Zach loved singing and preferred people on-key. They always hugged. Never kissed. At least Zach and Jacob had sneakers in common— the thing that brought them together— and Jacob gushed about Zach in that cutesy, fanboy way whenever possible. Also, they loved mythology, Zach referencing the kraken sea monster and Jacob always bringing up Icarus, who flew close to the sun. These two are still in their twenties, the age of constant learning and growing, entering and leaving relationships, building themselves up and maturing in all facets of life. Maybe they can come back someday. Who knows? It’s fascinating to watch Jacob and Zach navigate the contemporary dating scene— even if we don’t get to see Zach’s journey onscreen. Jacob has Gregory and Janine. Together they’re a trio of singles becoming closer than ever. 

Overall, Abbott Elementary’s impressive ensemble kills it every week— guest stars of LGBTQIA+ community included. Sabrina Wu, the eccentric K-pop loving scene stealer of Adele Lim’s raunchy feature-length debut Joy Ride was Janine’s sub teacher of the week, Cassidy Geoffrey. The incredible Larry Owens, Zach’s portrayer who’s won major theater awards galore, must return. He could be a temporary choir teacher pretending not to harbor jealousy over Jacob’s dating “success” stories or just a raucous uncle chaperoning his nephew to eighth grade. Regular Chris Perfetti, our resident Mr. C, remains a wonderful gifted performer, nailing every beat of Jacob’s trials and tribulations.

Now with another couple’s recent demise, is Barbara and Gerald or Ava and Iggie [snorts] safe?